Please Get Me Home

Sitting on a soft cushion in a long journey
Staring at a woman hugging her little sleepy-head
My heart is not comfy enough
Lying against the icy window in the rain
Glancing at the sceneries of wet green flashing in the other way
Trying very hard to not miss any of the signboard
Hoping to see familiar views of my own
With my footprints
And the laughters I missed

I’m on my way
Holding tears and hopes
To get back into my warm home
To my olden days
Keep head count of the decreasing miles
But it seems far although its near
Please get me home

Listening to my decorated iPod
Repeating “Home”
For the first time ever
Understanding the story behind those words
Cheeks are a bit of wet
Searching my pack of pulps
But what I found
Was my torn pieces of family photo in 80’s
Risen my guilt of disappointing them

Oh I’m on my way
To my olden days
Keep head count of the decreasing miles
Holding tears and hopes
To get back into my warm home
But it seems far although its near
Please get me home

Keeping my fingers cross
Holding my both grown hands tightly
With prays swaying in my mind
A fear of stuck in horrible tragic
That will steal me away without saying “Sorry”
Without gettin’ one of the hell slap from my loved ones
Due to my disgrace to them
Would I make it…..
Can I be excused to make it?????

I’m on my way
To my olden days
Keep head count of the decreasing miles
Holding tears and hopes
To get back into my warm home
But it seems far although its near
Please get me home

OH OH…..
I’m on my way
To my olden days
Keep head count of the decreasing miles
Holding tears and hopes
To get back into my warm home
But it seems far although its near
Please get me home

Please get me home


Please get me home……

I’m sorry

This is my first written song. I am too bored on my journey to KL...So I use one hour of my trip to think of these lines of words....Those OHs might seem to be annoying, but to create the sense of song, I add them to the song.......The English I used are all simple, I'm working hard to learn more and update my level.....HAHAHA...I would like comments from you all....I love to write song, but sometimes I lazy to type them out.......It will be my dream come true if I have the chance to work with someone to make this a real song..Seems like a big dream, but I'm really looking forward to it....I will be posting some of my songs.....I am working hard on it..This is my newest hobby to fill up my spare time.....Thanks all and do comment....Personally or openly I don't mind....

Modern Love, No More Romeo and Juliet......

Being belonged to a loving, romantic relationship, will be every youth's fantasy, or even major goal of life for some people. I'm one of the typical teen, so, welcome to the group. Loving relationship, the sacred bond between a boy and a girl, is the most miracle and amazing creation of the Almighty, from the first man and woman on Earth- Adam and Eve, to symbolise the expansion of population from the unity of a man and a woman through their unconditional acceptance, moreover, to emphasise on the need of tolerance between a man and a woman, without competition of who is better or worse.

From what I've encountered these years, youths are getting blinded by desperation or stimulation from other friends. For example, A and B are close friends. One day, A called B and said: ' Dei A, I got a girl la....Her name is XXX....she is hot, sexy and loving...Omg!! i'm lucky dei!! just went out for Ugly Truth with her....blah blah blah!!! ' Responders, if you are B, how would you feel??? Don't tell me you feel happy for him.Yeah!! That will be the mask you wear to forbid your envy and jealousy. Ok, you might feel happy and congrats him upon his success in conquering a romance. But, deep inside your inner self, as a normal human being, you will feel unhappy and disappointed on your potential.

Another case will be due to desperation. Desperate is the demon we should avoid when it comes to love. If we desperate, we will tend to find who ever beside us and make him or her as our date, companion. People, will this relationship go on?? No true love from either side, how to feel the love?? Due to these "magnets of destructions", we fail to sustain a true relationship.

In the olden days, first love will be the eternal love, leading to build a happy married life. But nowadays, those fairytales of " live happily ever after" is no more heard. Nowadays, trend of getting divorce is becoming vigorous, as one of the popular "hobby" in modern society. Some have even heard of news husband murdering wife, wife runaway with another guy. Having affairS is not a big deal now. We might came across with some online articles about confession of a man upon his divorce, saying: " She is not good in bed.." What kind of answer is that?? Even teenagers, I heard some of them had boyfriends or girlfriends just to taste the experience of having clandestine relationships. Does true love means the interaction between bodies?? That's not love, there is another word to describe that.

Ok...Lets forget about stories of Adam and Eve. One huge question:"Are most modern marriages last long....." Let me give my opinion. My answer will be: " Some lasts....but most in riot....but some ends tragically.." Nowadays, some countries have permitted gay and lesbian marriages legally( I'm not into labelling but due to the situation, I have to use it to differentiate....sorry)..but some countries still reluctant to do leave the answer to you all..... Is these marriages are disgrace to the purity of sacred love and marriages?? Hell no!! I would say those marriages are the most purified and long-lastig marriage because the understand each others position, background, interest and moreover, love each other....Most important, the love they have that make them dare to face th world as themselves, without hiding under the shadows of the community!! Salute you all!!! As straight marriages, tends to find other mates when our mate can't fulfill our need....Marriage is not a game, its a sort of destiny that we have to meet.....We find som many people to love, but only one suits....Arrage wedding and by the blessings of the angles, God and human, the married life of the couple has begin...But, due to certain ego on who is powerful or suddenly found someone who is better, the bond breaks apart!!! Love is blind...We all love to emphasise it theoritically but practically, we hate the phrase. Why?? Because we always kept imagining the wedding photos, the future gatherings and etc.....Seen someone fat, gone case.....Someone had a scar on the face...out!!! But, reality, its the heart and leadership is going to build a nice life pathway till the end.

Teens, just imagined how your future marriage will be, is it based on the love of judging the appearance or the content of it. " Don't judge a book from its cover " . If you find someone has attractive appearance, don't just blindly get into the action to get him or her. Understand first, after knowing each other well then propose. I know most of the people will feel boring and lengthy, but for the sake of being a part of long-term romantic connection, this is the way. I know this is hard, but lets try it out!! Most important thing, don't be shy and don't ever ask someone to help you to get closer to the person you had a crush on, even if your best friend, because its just like asking someone to help you retrieve the prize money from your wining lottery ticket!!! Think wise as a brilliant teen to find your "Romeo and Juliet" !!!

P.S Love is blind!!! ( I think you guys understand......)

Le Memoria

Just now, I was rushing up my NOC( Non-objection Certificate) with Vick to send in to Putrajaya tomorrow. Suddenly, I felt something awkward, smell something missing....I turn around, and I aw my dad watching me filling up the form. I saw through his eyes, a bit wet....But what I saw, was satisfaction, proud, joy and of course, love and sadness.... I realise, I'm growing up!!

I still remember what my father told me... He said I weighed only 2.5kg when I was born( which is not good)...He said I'm cute, my skin was soft and fair....He said my fingers always hold on to his... From that day onwards, I was holding his hands until today.... He hold me pass through all my hard time and glorious moments. He is the only human that accompanies me in all my award ceremonies, performances and competitions. He said when I was small, i used to scared of anything...I will ran to him, hug him tightly and I will fell asleep...haha!! Now, seeing me attending interviews, filling up university admission forms, driving big cars, handling house chores, preparing for my future...He is amazed, touched and relieved of good rewards for his tiredness. ( Omg..I almost cried..)

Daddy, you taught me how to cope with my problems, until now everyone wondering why I can handle big thng with a smile....Thanks to you pa!!! Time flies.....I wana go back, hold your hands again, ride merry-go-round with you again, cry for toys again, wana you to cane me again........ Pa....You can count on me!! I will never let you down.....i want you to be with me for the rest of my life, seeing me succeeding in my life..I promise I will become a skillful and professional specialist!!!

I don't have enough time...In one month time, my sister is leaving to chase her dream..... I am preparing myself for her send-off....I don't know whether I can take it coolly or not.....SHIT!!! Think back those time we toghether, laugh, cry, fight, hug, perform, play, compete.......T.T!!!!

....... Can't continue!! sorry guys!!!....

My Worse Regret

I lost my trust on you.....Before days, people will mocked me with stupid, idiot for trusting you...
But reality, I'm blinded!!! Now, I realized what are you doing, stabbing me with as many knives as you can....My friends have been warning, advising me, but what I care is just...YOU!!!
And what you have done to me......betraying and back stabbing me!!!

A small damn matter, which you have promised to not tell anyone can be one of your gossip topics...Is this the way you get self happiness??Bullshit!!!

Hey, what you get from defeating me!!!! Why you need to do so???people normally think I'm crazy to stick around you, now I'm regretting!!!! A lot !!!!!

I have my patience and limit, don't try to tease me.....You people would think I'm a doll, easy to defeat me...You guys never, in fact no one, except my family have seen my true colour!!!


A Post For Me To ShoutOUT!!

There is something going around my mind and heart, striking through them and creating pain. Not just ordinary pain, but its disappointment, a feeling being left out.

We are friends for long period of time...To the universe, we got certain nicknames...Some called us sisters, twins...Basically, We are glued to each other. Thats what the world thinks. I even heard of someone saying: " If you find him, just looking for "him" and you will find him". How disappointing am I when hearing such joyful comments about us. But in my opinion, I think we didn't reach that level yet, or should I say, still very very far from it.

Everyday, I am dealing with my aching feelings and emotions...Think back the time when we were first met, still that innocent look we both portrayed, and the freshly spoken words and laughters, I still imagine those happiness we had in our past times.. Lately, I even cried thinking about our nostalgic moments. Only Yiing Chau knows about it..( Thanks for sharing my EMO moments, ah Chau)

I am damn pissed off when people came bugging me asked about your things:"Why he so EMO today?? You both fight arr?? Why he so happy today??Who is his new lover??blah blah blah......" I don't have answers for those questions, I don't even know what is happening to him lately....Others know more things about him....People said I should know more than anyone, but the point is, its not???

These are all just my opinion...I don't think I'm wrong to express my feelings on my blog.. If I'm wrong, I need to know why I'm wrong...Perhaps we need to talk, a long heart to heart talk.....Even we had the chance, I don't think I'm dare to ask you all that questions.....Because the gap between me and you seems to be growing day by day.

Next year, you will be in another continent.. To say frankly, I will be damn missing you!!! In secondary school, a lot of guys came to me, asking why am I still befriend with you...My answer is: " He is honest with himself and he doesn't like to put face mask over his feelings.....If he dislikes something, just shoot it out...." Tomorrow we might be here, together, laughing or crying...But later, its only our memories and those pictures we have taken will be the significance of our past life. Until now, I'm still thinking you are my best friend. I can't bare the time when we are specchless in car, don't know what to say. Because I don't have topics to talk with you...Why?? Why?? WHy??...........This is not the first time I'm asking this question to myself...( Again if Im wrong, please correct me, because I want to know whats going on and I need to know before we separate without telling each other a friendly " bye " )

On my Bday

Morning, after being awaken by the annoying colour-changing alarm clock ( it does change it colours when u press it...It's like a hypnotizing aid!!hehe ), four people stood around me..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! haha...its my family lah!!! I checked my handphone for any messages ( its a part of my daily routine ), I saw Yi Shuang's 2 msgs...I cried.....( when the lift opened, I saw your house's light is off )....I miss every seconds there!!!

Im so excited that day, because I was imagining what's going to happen in INTI later.....We had celebrations for some friends in INTI before, so I thought there will be some surprises for me....( cheap....but sure everyone has a hope in their mind oso like tat lo....!!! )

When I steped up to 4th floor, the floor was quiet.." wah, what a cold welcome...tks by the way!!) I waited until 10 am ( my chemistry class )... I went in, some of my friends scream HAPPY BIRTHDAY KUMAR!!!U ARE 18 LIAO!!!...." wah, thank GOD there's still people remembered my Bday...."And Miss Dorothy wished me too.....haha!!! At the lab, the twins( Tameer and Saameer Pani ), two Priyas wished me too...Thanks!!

Later, 12pm..... The hallway was crowded with people...As usual, I walked to CLHS geng....Yiing Chau wished me...Then I saw Xiang Yih...I was damn excited at that moment because he gave me hints that Im going to receive something special for my Bday...." ssssssssss..........." He came to me, with a weird smile....then he opened his bag!!!! " OMG..WATS THAT!!!" " Nah, my gift to you..."

" There's still more, open it now!!..." I became much more tense than before....Once i opened it:

OMG!!! My favourite pipa player's signature and he wrote my name on it.... I almost cried, so I hugged Xiang Yih for a while..... So sweet!!! To me lah.... Although its a DVD, to me it means a lot... Thanks Xiang Yih, Xi Ying and Hong Wei!!!!

After our lunch, as usual wen to our cubical to chat and make noise....We are good for it!!! Suddenly, someone called me from the 1st cubical ( I think its Wayne lah...) When I went there, I think June Wynn asked me: " Izzit today your birthday? " I said : " ya... " after that, she start to sing Happy Birthday to me loudly...I a few seconds the whole floor sang!!!! OMG...its loud!!! After the song ends, everyone cheer and clap hands!! I was so shy and dunno what to tell...Guys and girls, thanks for that!! I was so happy...Its better than what I was imagined.....

1pm, Maths Extension 1 class. I went in without showing its my birthday. Once I entered the class, all the students screamed " HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!"..even Ms Yap was screaming too....WOW!!! Then she said:" Lets give him a big card!!" then she use half of the white board to draw...She was the first one to write, followed by all the others in the class...

Look carefully in this photo....

Seriously, I was touched... Thank you all so much and Ms Yap.....

Right after that, Biology. Once Ms Shirley entered, Wayne shouted: " Today is Kumar's birthday!!!" Then she came to me and said: " Happy Bday Kumar"..... Then, Vickram and Kaillash run to me and hugged me...They were not happy as I did tell them about my birthday....Sorry la!!! Then Shailaja and Bhairavi wished me too.....Hehe..... I remembered Elu wants to give me a Ferrari...hehe...Im waiting Elu!!!

I received SMS from my friends too... Like Kai Yee, Huan Li, Yeh Chern, Natalie, Vickram ( he SMSed me when sitting beside me during Bio class ), Yong Liang ( during english class ).. Some wished me through MSN, like Yi kar and Xi Ying( she is hillarious..HAHA!!!).. And even some surprised wishes on Facebbok..Like Ms Leela, Jae, Jay Moy, Ipsita and Julia...and even Jameson and Allan Tan Kean Yang!!! thanks to Facebook and Friendster Birthday Alarm!! There's a lot of people to thanked for the warm hugs, gift, gigantic card, song and wishes...

I hereby thank all the people that I cared... Thank you all so so so so so so so mucccchh!!!!...........
( If I left out anything, please forgive me!!! )

L changes the world

Everyone has knowledge...everyone has their own specialty, uniqueness allocated deep in their self. Showing off for wat??!!! People cant bear you.....have you ever felt that before???? Are we bunch of stupid heads to you!! Hello...waky waky......WE have top ranked students of HSC.....with brilliant thinking skill and powerful determination....maybe SHE will love your knowledge( or perhaps its true)..fall for your uncertified informations..... and get attracted to your invertebraeness....

You think SHE will be your masquerade over your XXX side??? If SHE agrees, excuse me and my partner to give HER the slap of HER life....hoe stupid a girl should be!!!! stupid!!stupid!!stupid!!!
( The identity of SHE will not be clarified....If you think your are smart enough, Im sure you can think of it..Dont try any way to dig it from me...... If you asked me, silence or ignorance will be the appropriate answer.... ) I have a question: Are you gay or straight?? To me are.....( you know la!! )

Knowing extra languages, good for you...But showing them off...HMM..well.......Bad for you ofcourse!!! Do you ever think what people will think of you when open your valveless mouth!!!! Annoying you know!!!!! Totally..Unbearable.... I don't wanna write much about you...As Im not the first one.........

Advice to readers:
1. Avoid masks
2. Say no to alcohols.....especially when you cant close your mouth....
3. Dont ever try to show off..... You are not the good one...
4. Dont 10 your driving skills ( especially drifting parts ).....You will never know when you will be the victim of SHUT UP BITCH!!!
5. If no support, have a stick with..because not every man will lend you their shoulders
6. Lastly...
If you have got a chance to know this kind of people, please isolate yourself from him as far as you can!!! You will thank me later!!!

P.S. L is a pun